It is August, late August, and this time of year seems to always be difficult for me. Why? I think it is because August used to mean back-to-school time, which was a time of very mixed feelings for me. Before marriage (yes, I can sometimes remember back that far), back-to-school meant excitement and dread stirred together. Excitement for new experiences; dread of forced routine and other people insisting that I do tasks I didn't want to do. And, I suffer from self-imposed pressure to finish projects well before they are due. I am not a procrastinator. This tendency increased the 'dread' feelings. After I had children, back-to-school time meant I would finally have more time to clean my house, do the laundry, and perhaps sneak in some reading. But it also meant the loss of the hub-bub that children provide, including spontaneous hugs and cute behaviors to view. Now, as a reluctant empty-nester, late August holds some kind of ominous feeling that others have activities coming to entertain and busy them, which I will not have.
I seem to be pretty negative, huh? I guess another piece of chocolate will cheer me up...
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